Desperately need help

I’m on my phone so this will be brief.
42 w m
Long history of mental health issues
Never given/told a specific diagnosis just off hand comments and prescriptions.
I am suffering from Bipolar disorder and social/general anxiety and panic attacks.
I have moved a lot and have changed health care providers many times, which is why I think I haven’t gotten an actual dx and why my current state is in upheaval.
I was arrested in September and as a result I have lost my job, insurance, dignity, friends among other things.
I am facing trial and real jail time, had to move to a different state etc. I desperately need help. Simply thinking of going outside to my car (maybe 200’) sends me into a panic attack. How/where can I get help?
I am (currently) able to stave off the suicidal thoughts but truly feel a time will come where I can either not stem the thoughts or find easy access to means to kill myself.
Talking is great, when I had insurance and could afford to see a therapist I truly felt as though talk therapy provided more results than meds did. Yet now, when talking is the only thing I can afford, I am unable to speak. I am finding it impossible to feel safe/comfortable when speaking to anyone. Not my wife, not my firends (20+ year friends) not my family. Not a soul.
Please help; someone. Anyone.

We are so sorry to hear about your situation- care is hard to find but we totally agree how powerful talking to someone can be! Below we have added some resource options you can call and someone will be there to answer at any time to help stave off suicidal planning. Also we have attached a local resource for you we hope all the best to you and that you get the care you deserve. We will also follow up by email